Protect Your Heart While You Grieve

It’s been a few years since I’ve written about self-care (Self Care or Selfish), but it remains an integral part in helping walk through the grief journey. Recently, I’ve been thinking that no matter how much time goes by, it’s still so important to protect your heart while you grieve.  As the season changes fromContinue reading “Protect Your Heart While You Grieve”

Grievers are Survivors

When we think of those who are grieving, we tend to lean more toward the negative. After all, what do grief and loss bring? Intense sadness, anxiety, depression, fear, and even anger. But hold on. If we take a moment to look closely at a person who is walking the grief journey, I believe weContinue reading “Grievers are Survivors”

The Faithfulness of God During Hard Times

We often turn our anger toward God when we walk through grief and other challenging moments. When a loved one dies, it’s normal to question the faithfulness of God during hard times. After all, how could a good and faithful God have allowed this bad thing to happen to you and your family? If you’reContinue reading “The Faithfulness of God During Hard Times”

The Road from Grief to Peace and Acceptance

As I continue to meet others on this grief journey one of the most common questions I get is, “How long will grief last?” That seems to be the million-dollar question. Wouldn’t it be nice if there was a definitive answer? Instead of being a one-size-fits-all, the road from grief to peace and acceptance differsContinue reading “The Road from Grief to Peace and Acceptance”

Elvis and My Dad

On Tuesday afternoon, August 16, 1977, I was walking down the street with my portable transistor radio listening to the latest disco music. Then all of a sudden, the newscaster broke through and announced that Elvis Presley had died. I can still clearly remember having an overwhelming feeling of sadness. I couldn’t believe that the KingContinue reading “Elvis and My Dad”

Loss, Trauma, and Catastrophizing

If you’ve been walking this grief journey for any length of time, you are well acquainted with grief. But are you familiar with catastrophizing? Loss, trauma, and catastrophizing frequently go hand-in-hand for many of us who have lost a loved one.    Until recently, I had never heard the phrase used in this context, butContinue reading “Loss, Trauma, and Catastrophizing”

Lessons in Grief

During this time of year, many of us are sending our children back to school. Please tell me, where did the summer go? Time truly is moving by much too fast. I’m sitting here wondering how it is that we are sending our youngest off to his first year of high school tomorrow. Wasn’t itContinue reading “Lessons in Grief”

Carrying Our Bag of Sorrows

As we go through life, we carry many things with us – memories of our first loves, the day we got married, the births of our children, overall life experiences – both happy and sad. Inevitably, we also carry the hurts and losses – deaths of loved ones, broken relationships, job loss, wayward children. TheContinue reading “Carrying Our Bag of Sorrows”

The Emptiness of Grief

When I was growing up, if someone died, my mother would immediately head for the kitchen, where she would begin cooking a beautiful Italian meal of sauce, meatballs, and pasta. She’d then ask my father to drive her over to that person’s house so she could sit with them. Inevitably, when we arrived, the houseContinue reading “The Emptiness of Grief”

The Battle for Quiet Time

The older I get, time seems to be more elusive. The battle for quiet time has become my opponent. While walking this grief journey, there are times when every moment seems like a battle. So, what have the best Generals in the Army done when they are in a fight? They create a plan toContinue reading “The Battle for Quiet Time”

Compartmentalizing Grief: Are You a Waffle or a Spaghetti?

When my husband and I first got married, I remember reading a book called, “Men Are Like Waffles, and Women Are Like Spaghetti.” Funny title, isn’t it? But one I’ve never forgotten. While the grief journey continues to ebb and flow, recently, Melanie has been strongly on my heart. I came across some photos of herContinue reading “Compartmentalizing Grief: Are You a Waffle or a Spaghetti?”

Bereaved Parents Awareness Month

Every year the month of July is designated as Bereaved Parents Awareness Month. There was a time in my life when I never knew such a thing existed. However, now, as a parent who has a child who ran ahead to heaven, I’m all too painfully aware. At first, I wondered why we needed aContinue reading “Bereaved Parents Awareness Month”

The Fight to Flourish

Grief work is hard. It seems absurd to make that statement because anyone who has suffered a loss knows how difficult this journey is. We don’t get through grief by happenstance. It takes work to walk this road. After losing my daughter, I read as much as possible as I tried to piece together theContinue reading “The Fight to Flourish”

Living on Earth with My Eyes on Heaven

Since Melanie ran ahead to Heaven, I’ve become more curious about the place that is now her home. Because that’s where my girl is, I want to know as much about Heaven as possible. As the years have passed, I realize I’m living on Earth with my eyes on Heaven.    Have you thought ofContinue reading “Living on Earth with My Eyes on Heaven”

Even in the Broken Parts Hope is Never Gone

Recently I was thinking about the verse, “Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil for you are with me; your rod and your staff they comfort me.” Psalm 23:4 NIV. For those of us who have a loved one who ran ahead to heaven, we know what it’s likeContinue reading “Even in the Broken Parts Hope is Never Gone”

The Multiplication and Division of Grief

We are at a point in our home where neither my husband nor I can help our son any longer in math. When he came home talking about quadratic equations, my eyes rolled into the back of my head. But even without being proficient in this level of math, there is some basic mathematics IContinue reading “The Multiplication and Division of Grief”

Practicing the 3 C’s of Grief: Choose, Connect, Communicate

The grief journey isn’t a sprint; it’s a marathon. Like sprint runners, we will not get through our grief in 1 minute 20 seconds. Several friends have run the Boston Marathon, which takes months of rigorous training and preparation. They need to practice running short intervals, then slowly, they begin increasing the time of theirContinue reading “Practicing the 3 C’s of Grief: Choose, Connect, Communicate”

Grief, Grit and Grace

Grief, grit, and grace are three different words and meanings, but in some ways complimentary of one another. Not long ago, someone told me I had a lot of grit while grieving Melanie’s death. I was aware that the definition of grief is sorrow, misery, anguish, pain, distress, and agony – all facets of grief I keenly possessed.Continue reading “Grief, Grit and Grace”

Scars: A Double-Edged Sword

After having surgery a few months ago there is still a telltale sign reminding me of what happened. Even after several months, a tiny pink scar remains as an outward sign of what was. After all, as we go through life, most of us will end up with scars – some visible and others thatContinue reading “Scars: A Double-Edged Sword”

Worry and Anxiety: A Consequence of Grief

Currently, I’m reading Winning the War on Worry by Louie Giglio with our small group. Although it’s a concise book (only 100 pages), it’s powerful and has made me stop and think long and hard about some of the things I’ve experienced since Melanie ran ahead to heaven. While examining my heart, it’s brought meContinue reading “Worry and Anxiety: A Consequence of Grief”

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