Protect Your Heart While You Grieve

It’s been a few years since I’ve written about self-care (Self Care or Selfish), but it remains an integral part in helping walk through the grief journey. Recently, I’ve been thinking that no matter how much time goes by, it’s still so important to protect your heart while you grieve.  As the season changes fromContinue reading “Protect Your Heart While You Grieve”

Grievers are Survivors

When we think of those who are grieving, we tend to lean more toward the negative. After all, what do grief and loss bring? Intense sadness, anxiety, depression, fear, and even anger. But hold on. If we take a moment to look closely at a person who is walking the grief journey, I believe weContinue reading “Grievers are Survivors”

The Faithfulness of God During Hard Times

We often turn our anger toward God when we walk through grief and other challenging moments. When a loved one dies, it’s normal to question the faithfulness of God during hard times. After all, how could a good and faithful God have allowed this bad thing to happen to you and your family? If you’reContinue reading “The Faithfulness of God During Hard Times”

The Road from Grief to Peace and Acceptance

As I continue to meet others on this grief journey one of the most common questions I get is, “How long will grief last?” That seems to be the million-dollar question. Wouldn’t it be nice if there was a definitive answer? Instead of being a one-size-fits-all, the road from grief to peace and acceptance differsContinue reading “The Road from Grief to Peace and Acceptance”

International Overdose Awareness Day

Today is International Overdose Awareness Day. Each year on this day I create a special post specifically dedicated to honor the memory of all those who were lost to overdose and the parents who are grieving them. My daughter, Melanie lost her life to the disease of addiction in 2020. Prior to that I neverContinue reading “International Overdose Awareness Day”

Elvis and My Dad

On Tuesday afternoon, August 16, 1977, I was walking down the street with my portable transistor radio listening to the latest disco music. Then all of a sudden, the newscaster broke through and announced that Elvis Presley had died. I can still clearly remember having an overwhelming feeling of sadness. I couldn’t believe that the KingContinue reading “Elvis and My Dad”

Loss, Trauma, and Catastrophizing

If you’ve been walking this grief journey for any length of time, you are well acquainted with grief. But are you familiar with catastrophizing? Loss, trauma, and catastrophizing frequently go hand-in-hand for many of us who have lost a loved one.    Until recently, I had never heard the phrase used in this context, butContinue reading “Loss, Trauma, and Catastrophizing”

Lessons in Grief

During this time of year, many of us are sending our children back to school. Please tell me, where did the summer go? Time truly is moving by much too fast. I’m sitting here wondering how it is that we are sending our youngest off to his first year of high school tomorrow. Wasn’t itContinue reading “Lessons in Grief”

Carrying Our Bag of Sorrows

As we go through life, we carry many things with us – memories of our first loves, the day we got married, the births of our children, overall life experiences – both happy and sad. Inevitably, we also carry the hurts and losses – deaths of loved ones, broken relationships, job loss, wayward children. TheContinue reading “Carrying Our Bag of Sorrows”

The Emptiness of Grief

When I was growing up, if someone died, my mother would immediately head for the kitchen, where she would begin cooking a beautiful Italian meal of sauce, meatballs, and pasta. She’d then ask my father to drive her over to that person’s house so she could sit with them. Inevitably, when we arrived, the houseContinue reading “The Emptiness of Grief”

The Battle for Quiet Time

The older I get, time seems to be more elusive. The battle for quiet time has become my opponent. While walking this grief journey, there are times when every moment seems like a battle. So, what have the best Generals in the Army done when they are in a fight? They create a plan toContinue reading “The Battle for Quiet Time”

Compartmentalizing Grief: Are You a Waffle or a Spaghetti?

When my husband and I first got married, I remember reading a book called, “Men Are Like Waffles, and Women Are Like Spaghetti.” Funny title, isn’t it? But one I’ve never forgotten. While the grief journey continues to ebb and flow, recently, Melanie has been strongly on my heart. I came across some photos of herContinue reading “Compartmentalizing Grief: Are You a Waffle or a Spaghetti?”

Bereaved Parents Awareness Month

Every year the month of July is designated as Bereaved Parents Awareness Month. There was a time in my life when I never knew such a thing existed. However, now, as a parent who has a child who ran ahead to heaven, I’m all too painfully aware. At first, I wondered why we needed aContinue reading “Bereaved Parents Awareness Month”

Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop

Without realizing it, it occurred to me that I have often lived my life waiting for the other shoe to drop. It doesn’t take a session being psychoanalyzed to know this comes from the fact that both my father and daughter died unexpectedly. When a traumatic death occurs, we face the unfortunate fact that ourContinue reading “Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop”

The Fight to Flourish

Grief work is hard. It seems absurd to make that statement because anyone who has suffered a loss knows how difficult this journey is. We don’t get through grief by happenstance. It takes work to walk this road. After losing my daughter, I read as much as possible as I tried to piece together theContinue reading “The Fight to Flourish”

The Knower of My Everything

When walking through the grief journey, how many of us have heard, “We’re praying for you?” How many times have we said this to others? I know I’ve probably said it thousands of times. But really, when we say we’re praying for someone, what do we do? Do we have to quote scripture? Do weContinue reading “The Knower of My Everything”

Living on Earth with My Eyes on Heaven

Since Melanie ran ahead to Heaven, I’ve become more curious about the place that is now her home. Because that’s where my girl is, I want to know as much about Heaven as possible. As the years have passed, I realize I’m living on Earth with my eyes on Heaven.    Have you thought ofContinue reading “Living on Earth with My Eyes on Heaven”

How Long Will the Pain Last

This is a frequent question among those who find themselves grieving. During the early days, pain is expected. Even as the weeks become months, there is an expectation and understanding that we are still in pain as we grieve the loss of our loved ones. But as time begins to move forward and the painContinue reading “How Long Will the Pain Last”

A Broken Heart Still Beats

When I was told that my daughter died, it took my heart a moment to catch up with the words my ears heard. The first thing I felt was shock, followed by numbness. I’m convinced this is the body’s way of protecting itself. Looking back on those early hours, I’m in awe that I couldContinue reading “A Broken Heart Still Beats”

International Bereaved Mother’s Day

Each year the week before Mother’s Day, the world observes International Bereaved Mother’s Day. This year it is on Sunday, May 7th. Who knew there was such a thing? I didn’t realize this until I needed to know.  We acknowledge this day because no matter what the circumstance surrounding the death of our children, we would chooseContinue reading “International Bereaved Mother’s Day”

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