When the world around you falls apart, and you’re completely blindsided by life, you may wonder, where is God? Does he even exist? While many may cry out to him, others may ask, where is he? Is he even here? If so, how could he let this happen? If you’re like me and are walking through child loss, I’m sure you’ve asked yourself these questions and many more. Yet, time stops for no one, and as hard as it’s been, there will come a day when we realize we need to accept the life we didn’t choose.
If we had our choice, our loved ones would still be here. Living. Breathing. Experiencing life together. Why life had to unfold the way it did remains an unanswered question and one we won’t have an answer to this side of heaven. Death also comes with losing many hopes and dreams for how our lives will go. The end of all those dreams is as hard as losing our loved ones.
When unexpected and traumatic death comes knocking on your door, we must figure out where we go from here. Giving up is not an option. Even through the hardest of times, my faith is what sustained me. It came down to trust, faith, and hope. Trust that God is who he says he is. Faith that his word is true. And holding on to the hope in Christ.
We may not understand the why of this chapter in our story but accepting the life we didn’t choose can open the door, allowing God to use this part of our story in ways we never imagined. If given my choice, I would have picked a different outcome for my life. One thing I do know is that my thoughts are not God’s thoughts, and His ways are higher than mine. (Isaiah 55:8-9). So, I will continue to rely on and trust in him – the rock and cornerstone of my life, as I also continue to accept the life I would not have chosen for myself.
You’re my safe place, my hide away
You’re my anchor, my saving grace
You’re my constant, my steadiness
You’re my shelter, my oxygen
I don’t know who I’d be if I didn’t know You
I’d probably fall off the edge
I don’t know where I’d go if You ever let go
So keep me held in Your hands
I don’t know who I’d be if I didn’t know You
Thank God I do ~ Lauren Daigle