Have you ever asked yourself, Why Me? Perhaps you’ve wondered why your life has unfolded like it has. Do you feel as if your life is a mess?
Maybe you’ve looked around and it appeared as if everyone around you seemed to be living their best life, except you.
I’m not suggesting we begin a pity-party, or have a woe is me attitude, but I do think these are all very normal questions and feelings. I believe they are especially valid if you are grieving.
When we are going through difficulties and heavy times in life, such as grieving the loss of a loved one, this is part of the journey. Friend, if you can just hold on for a little bit longer I believe this mess can be turned into your message.
When Melanie first ran ahead to heaven I asked God, why me? Why Melanie? I always came back to the one thing I know to be true – my ultimate faith and trust in him. What I know is this: I don’t see the whole picture of this life of mine and I need to trust in the one who does see the end from the beginning.
Trust God from the bottom of your heart;
don’t try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;
he’s the one who will keep you on track.
Don’t assume that you know it all. ~ Proverbs 3:5-6 MSG
There is a person in my life who has told me more than once, “Pat, it’s like you have a black cloud hanging over your head.” Although he doesn’t say this to be hurtful I don’t think he has any idea how those words sting. Do you know what the interesting thing is? I don’t feel as if I have a black cloud hanging over my head at all!
We live in a world where people – all people – have challenges in life. Do some seem to have more challenges than others? Yes! But it’s not a black cloud – it’s called LIFE!! God never promised us a carefree life. “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” – John 16:33
As I walk through my grief journey, I have come to see that grief and joy really can live side-by-side. I’m learning something new every single day, and he is turning my mess into a message.
I don’t know the circumstances surrounding your loss or how you’re feeling today, but I believe even in the midst of the trials and turmoil of life we still serve a God who is good. Although I may not know or understand his plan I’m confident he has one that is good for me. “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11 NLT
After writing Beautifully Broken: Finding Hope During Loss, I feared being known as the “grief lady.” If someone’s child died, I had people calling and texting asking me to reach out to the family. Some of them were people I didn’t even know.
In the beginning I wasn’t sure how comfortable I was being placed in this role. Then, I realized that my story was not being wasted. God was using me for his good.
In the words of Katherine Wolf, we can live a “goodhard life.” Every cloud, even black ones, has a silver lining.
I’m grateful that even in the midst of my grief, I do still have a very good life. With God’s help and leading I’m able to turn some of the sadness of losing my girl into something that can encourage and offer hope to someone else.
If you’re struggling today and wondering, why me, I encourage you to hold on. God can and will turn your mess into a message. He will use your story to reach someone else who is hurting. He isn’t done with you yet.