See the Light

‘Cause it don’t matter where you come from
I know we can get through this
It might feel like it’s been so long
But we keep on keepin’ on
It might feel like an uphill climb
Always some kind of battle
But you got more than you on your side
We’re gonna see the light
You and me
We’re gonna see the light
~ See the Light, Toby Mac

During the summer months one of the things I like most is how it stays light outside until late in the evening. There is something about the warmth and beauty of the summer days that brings a warmth and peace to my soul.  As a young girl growing up outside of Boston, summers were short!  As soon as Labor Day rolled around, not only would you stop wearing white (wink-wink), the weather changed and you were soon digging out a light jacket, as the days began to get a little bit cooler.  Now that I’m living in the South, I love that we can stretch out the warmth of those summer days until at least early November. But no matter where I’ve lived, or how long or short the summer months are I’ll admit there has always been something about the light that draws me in and fills me with peace.   

Recently, the words to the song, See the Light, began coming up in my heart over and over again.  The song was written by my son’s favorite Christian artist, Toby Mac.  I had never heard of Toby until about 4 yrs. ago when my then 7-year-old introduced me to his music. I’ve since become a fan myself.  Little did I know then how similar my life as a suburban mom would parallel with a Christian artist from Tennessee.  What I didn’t know then, and what the world at large wasn’t aware of was that Toby’s oldest son, Truett, was fighting the same disease as my Melanie.  You see, it really doesn’t matter where you come from. Whether you’re famous or the family next door.  A single parent or married for 25 yrs. to your high school sweetheart.  Rich, poor, living in the best neighborhood or living in the projects.  In the church, or out of the church – addiction doesn’t care about those things!  This disease touches people from all walks of life.  Back in October 2019, I remember reading a post on Toby’s social media asking the public to pray for him and his family as Truett died at the age of 21.  The cause of Truett’s death wasn’t immediately publicized and quite frankly, the reason for his death wasn’t what was most important.   A mother and father just lost their firstborn at a very young age.  Death and grief touch at the core of our heart whether it’s a child, spouse, parent, sibling or close friend.  Whether they’ve died from a car accident, disease, or any other myriad of reasons, the pain and hurt are all the same.  Grief is grief.  Sadness is sadness.  What remains most memorable to me was the statement Toby shared (my paraphrase): “God is still our rock, no matter what the circumstances and we will continue to love and serve him”.

A couple of months later, I would find myself listening to the Celebration of Life service for Lois Evans, wife of Dr. Tony Evans and mother of Priscilla Shirer, (author, speaker, actress from War Room, Overcomer).   I can’t tell you why I decided to listen to this because I have no answer.  Yes, I enjoy listening to Priscilla and her powerful messages which are aimed toward encouraging women in their walk with Christ, but I can’t explain why I felt drawn to listen to her mother’s funeral service.  I had also recently begun following Dr. Tony Evans, Priscilla’s father, who is a longtime pastor from Texas.  I learned of Lois’ cancer diagnosis several months earlier and knew the family had been believing God for a miraculous healing.  One of Lois’ sons spoke at the service and shared something that sticks in my mind until this day. He told the story about when his mom shared with the family that she had cancer, and all the things they did both medically and prayerfully to believe for her healing.  Then he said, “Momma was either going to be healed, OR she was going to be healed”!  As it would be, Lois was healed – it just didn’t happen on this side of heaven.  When I first listened to that service, I had no idea that just a few short months later I would be burying my own daughter at 38 yrs. old.  But God knew. 

I look back on this now and I see that He was preparing me for what was about to happen.  He is the Alpha and The Omega – the beginning and the end.  Just like Lois Evans, Melanie was healed.  It sure wasn’t in the way I had expected, but when I think about my girl, I feel a total peace in my heart knowing she is free!  Free from the constant struggle and heaviness that the weight of addiction brought to her for so long.  It doesn’t eliminate the sadness that I feel on those days when I’m missing her terribly.  I’ll always miss hearing her voice on the other end of my phone or looking into those beautiful light brown eyes and seeing her pretty, but sometimes, mischievous smile. 😊  As each day unfolds, whatever it brings, I will continue to go to my rock and place all my tears and cares there.  

I’ve thought more about heaven now than I ever have and I’ve often wondered what it was like when she saw the light of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.  As I listen to the words to this song by my brother in Christ, it brings a whole new meaning to me today.  In many ways we are all connected. Sometimes bad things happen to good people.  God never promised us a trouble-free life.  Instead, he promised that he would never leave us nor forsake us (Deuteronomy 31:8).  He would be with us as we pass through deep waters and when you walk through the fire you will not be burned (Isaiah 43:2).  No matter what, during this uphill climb, we need to cling to the One that can take us through it all.   I hope you’ll take a moment to listen to Toby’s song and let the words seep into your heart today.  May it help you to feel the warmth of God’s light and great love for you.

Some things will never be the same
Some things are only for a season
And just the thought of letting go
Well, it’s brought you to your knees
So go on and lift your hands up to where your help is comin’ from
And let your burdens, let ’em fade away…
We’re gonna see the light
~ See the Light, Toby Mac